Criticism of "The importance of oral servitude"

When I created this blog some two years ago I did so hoping to create debate. To be honest I never achieved that aim.  It's probably a combination of my lack of literary skills and that this blog is mainly read by like minded people. I do receive e-mails that are sometimes abusive but no real argument based in them other than "I'm evil and won't go to heaven" or "I'm a disgrace to the male race"

I think all blog writers enjoy receiving comments on their posts, I'm no exception. I don't get many comments and I have not as yet had a challenging one, until now. Below is a comment left after I wrote "The importance of oral servitude"

                   "Regarding this - "It is rare to find a Domme who will insist you pleasure her orally"
and this -
"Ladies, if you're reading this and your man has been coming up short then show him this and push his head down."
Do you actually account for the fact at all that some Ladies simply do not like receiving oral service?
Don't assume what every woman likes, just because it is part of your fantasy.Don't presume to know what we all want, and do not tell us what we should do.

It would have been nice if this hadnt have been posted anonymously, anonymity lessens an argument, I don't expect a real name. I cyber identity like mine would have done. However I will try to reply.

"It is rare to find a Domme who will insist you pleasure her orally"
and this -

I fully understand the reasons why Dommes, and remember I was referring to Pro Dommes don't offer this service and those reasons go way beyond wether they like receiving oral or not. I made it very clear that I have never asked for this service from a pure Pro Domme. I never will.

"Ladies, if you're reading this and your man has been coming up short then show him this and push his head down."

This sentence never stereotyped all women as loving receiving oral service. If a lady does not enjoy oral then she would never have considered that her man was coming up short in this area. It certainly was not telling you what you should do. It was meant to be tongue in cheek really. It most certainly was not telling you what to do, no more than "brush your teeth with Colgate". If you don't like Colgate you won't. 

You only have to read my blog to know that I never assume that any one body of people will all like the same things. My love of CP has been with me all my life and I have subsequently learned that I greatly enjoy other aspects of BDSM play. However I wouldn't like adult baby play, I don't have a foot tetish, cuckholdery saddens me, needle play terrofies me and scat and smoking play makes me want to vomit. However as I consistently say, if you enjoy these and it's consensual then great. I think no different regarding oral servitude. When I say the importance of oral servitude I mean in regards to myself.

Don't assume what every woman likes, just because it is part of your fantasy

I don't. In fact that's all this blog is. A chronical of my fantasies. Even when I'm telling a tale of a real session I never lose sight of the fact that all I did was live out a fantasy.  Only once have I ever offered myself up for a real un-pleasant experience and even that was selfish as it was to rid myself of guilt. 

I'm not anyone's real slave, no Domme loves me, in fact I wouldn't mind betting that many don't even like me. There have been only two Mistresses/disciplinarians who I've just handed total control over to and both of them in the last 14 months but even that is not real slavery is it ? Neither of them would do an act to me that I absolutely despised. I know some submissives thrive on the slave angle and would literally do anything Mistress asked but the Domme knows that from the outset.

Again one only has to read some of my postings to know how tuned in I am to the fantasy angle. Remember I'm the guy that questions if FLRs truly exist, as opposed to like minded people thoroughly enjoying a fetish together. That's why when I read FLR blogs I don't care if they are real or not.

I kept my post " The importance of oral servitude" in my draft file for months. I was always reluctant to post it because I thought it might be a bit distasteful ( excuse the pun ) but this blog is a reflection of my desires. Oral servitude is one of them.

In a nut shell, I know not all women like oral and I don't assume otherwise. I'm fully aware I feed my fantasies via this blog.

A big thank you to the CP, FLR and BDSM community

I wanted to take this opportunity to say a big thank you to many people, both professional and lifestyle alike for the e-mails and support I've had during what has been a difficult and testing year. The E-mails were great. I seem to have made many American acquaintances.

I would particularly like to thank three Dommes who know who they are. Each were fantastic during my recent twist in events. One lady even phoned me, another was lovely and another supportive beyond the call of duty.

To think "the others" think we are the weird ones.

Top of the table !

The importance of oral servitude.

Those in FLR relationships will already be well versed in the importance of this in true submission. It is a display of selflessness. It breaks the stereotype of the male only interested in his own pleasure. It puts the Woman's needs ahead of his, which is the ultimate aim of most of us true submissives. It is a display of love that says "I respect your needs" It's a gentle act and one I get great satisfaction out of when the result is a happy and satisfied Lady.

 

 

I think it is in this area most where I envy those in FLR relationships. It is rare to find a Domme who will insist you pleasure her orally and on all occasions I've had the pleasure during a session it has always been a surprise. Except for my visits to the London Retreat which specialises in intimate Femdom I have never asked for it.

 

 

 

We obviously never really know if an FLR blog is true or not but at least some must be and I'm yet to read one that doesn't have oral pleasure at it's corner stone, along with punishment in it's many forms. I'm not into the cuckhold scene at all but even there it appears large and strong. In my normal life when I get the opportunity to give oral I naturally do it in a very submissive way, my partner at the time may not know of my submissive tendancies but that doesn't stop me from treating her like a goddess and ensuring her pleasure however long it takes. It is the only area of normal "vanalla" sex that has a natural crossover for me. Perhaps that's why I like it so much as it gives me the opportunity to be who I really am sexually during normal sex.

 

 

 

My two fictional characters on this blog "Jill & Steve" have oral servitude as part of their lifestyle. Obviously really as I write it and all those stories are only a reflection of my fantasies and desires anyway.

 

 

 

Only a short and brief post I know but it gives you an idea of what is in my wonderfully perverted little mind. Any of you men reading this who are in an FLR who have just realised that they might have been a bit neglectful in this department I suggest you take a trip downstairs tonight and FLR Ladies, if you're reading this and your man has been coming up short then show him this and push his head down.

 

 

 

As for me ? Well I have my last session of the year booked for next week but because of a personal dissaster that is likely to be my last for a few months. Sad I know but eh, I still have my DESIRES.





 





Abstinence and the bathbrush

Just over a week ago I booked a session with a Domme I had sessioned with once before. I could name her as she doesn't mind and regular readers will easily work out who this great lady is but the selfish side of me wants to keep the identity half hidden at least.

At the point of booking the session I was instructed to abstain from masturbation for one week. I'm not an habitual masturbator so I thought this would be easy but I was sadly wrong. Just not choosing to masturbate and being instructed not to are as I've learnt two very different things. It was hell, by day 5 the advert below which I saw a 20 foot high version of nearly every day was driving me insane.I was also told I was to take her watersports. Oh I couldn't wait.

Day seven arrived and I found my self in a small clearing by some trees not far from Mistress' house, I was slowly breathing and getting my frame of mind from dull life to my subbie life. Then it was time to see Ma'am.

It was lovely to see this lady again and my sense of submissiveness towards her grew from the moment I entered the door. After catching up with a brief chat it was time for me to suffer and so it began.

Mistress had me up against a cross where she teased me relentlessly. gentle caressing, ice on nipples and genitals and her beauty thrust so close to my face. I yearned to lean forward and kiss her neck or the side of her face but I thought better of it. She rested my head onto her shoulder as she teased my most intimate parts. I was at the point of exploding. I think mistress might have let me come and still carried on with the rest of the session but I kept begging her to stop. I had a feeling that she wouldn't let a session go by without some form of CP because she enjoys it so much and I didn't fancy CP or watersports post orgasm. As I will explain later this might of been my undoing.

From the cross I was instructed to lay on my back. I saw Ma'am gather a bathbrush and ruler shaped but very thick spanking implement they looked painful. I knew nothing yet. My legs were hoisted into the air and I was soon in the diaper position but not for spanking, well not directly anyway. Ma'am inserted a finger into me and played with my prostate, Oh boy. She said "we need to get all that sperm into the balls" cruel words indeed as you will find out.

Now I need to explain something. I love CP, no surprises there but what I like is a slow build up from mild hand spanking to severe caning. All CP delivered cold is genuine punishment for me, as you know I subjected myself to it last December to heal a wound and it worked. That was a caning from hell but worse for me is a cold hairbrushing and that my friends is exactly what Mistress gave me.

It was murderous and the look of determination on Ma'am's face told me this wasn't going to be easy. The more I wriggled the worse it became til at one point it was only my head and shoulders on the sofa. Where Mistress got the strength from I don't know but she held on and spanked with those two terrible implements. I was wishing I had kissed her on the cross. I was hurting like I had.

I begged her to stop but she said "I decide when your punishment is over not you" eventually however she instructed me to lay on my front. Ma'am clearly wanted to spank me some more but she did ask me if "I needed more" I didn't, I was in agony but I really wanted to earn Ma'am's watersports so I agreed.

Eventually the spanking stopped. The only upside was the spanking was carried out in my favourite diaper position, other than that it was a very painful punishment. Ma'am then sat down and put my head on her lap, I was there for ages, long after I had calmed down from the punishment and that itself took ages.

After a while Ma'am started to talk to me, the conversation became very emotional, she pressed the right buttons and before I knew it I was in tears, lots of them. It was surreal and humbling. I'm sure you'll all understand if I don't tell you the content of the conversation.

And that was it, there was no watersports, there was no orgasm. So what do I think of that ? This Mistress is beginning to captivate me, it's only the second time that's happened, ironically two years on the trot now and both in December. It was fine, I'm a submissive, I turn up with desires not a shopping list, just like normal life really where circumstance dominates the outcome. In this case Mistress dominated the outcome.

I asked her for permission to masturbate this morning. My abstinence was for her pleasure so I felt the need for her permission to break it. It was granted. I'm sane again.

I said earlier in the year I was looking to have just one Domme in my life.

Maybe, just maybe.